A fool tells what he will do, a boaster tells what he has done, a wise man does it and says nothing. (from Ye Olde Flip Calendar, May 18th - no source)
I like to brag.
But, c'mon, who doesn't?
Isn't sneaky boasting alot of this whole blogging thing? I write some pithy post about Easter, and just happen to throw in a few tidbits about our ever-so-holy Passover meal. Or we share an encouraging home school story, and include pictures of beautifully organized books, studious children, extravagant science projects.
Yeah, whatever. A fool and a boaster am I.
Truth is, during that ever-so-holy Passover meal, I totally lost my cool with our 2-year-old about every 10 seconds, and entertained thoughts of offering her as the sacrificial lamb. And the little boys whined about the horseradish, the parsley, and the 'weird cracker' the entire time.
And home schooling? It is so not a pretty picture. Our books are never organized, the house is almost always a wreck, I'm perpetually weeks behind in grading & recording the older kids' work, and most days I wish we could hire a private tutor to come in and teach phonics, math, science, history...okay, well, everything.
There are so many things to be thankful for; my cup runneth over.
And over. and over. and over.
With all this fuel for gratitude, why do I spend most of my time utterly overwhelmed?
Is this it, Lord? Is this what it means to be a mommy, and a wife, and a friend, and daughter, and sister, and...and...
'Cause it just all seems like too much; I can't ever catch up, Lord. I just. can't. keep. up.
I look back on my blog posts & think, "dang, I'm such a whiner."
But then again, maybe I'm just sayin' what we're all feeling, but too afraid to admit, to say out loud, to bring into the light.
My life is unmanageable.
I need help.
I
Need
Help.
When I'm finally able to quit my boasting, and admit the reality of this mess of my life...
then...
then I can open my eyes & ears & soul to receive the help I so desperately need.
From soul-sister friends in my Tuesday morning girls-group, from cyber-sisters with sharing hearts, from fellow bloggers offering words of wisdom & truth & laughter & comfort & encouragement, from the well-loved words of books like Jesus Calling and One Thousand Gifts.
And in the quiet, still moments, God speaks; convicting, comforting, inviting, instructing. James whispers in the back of my mind, "faith without works is dead," and so I wipe my eyes, and blow my schnoz, and go do what I need to do, and be who I need to be, and put my faith into action.
So if you hear me boasting here? Just point me back to this post, 'kay?
'Cause no kidding, my life is a shambles. I need some pie.
Oh. And I seriously need help. and wisdom. and instruction.
Lord, let me not be such a fool!
Boast much? Oh, c'mon, admit it...we all do...
